In just a few days
everything changed
In just a few days
all was very different
So much better
than in a long time
So much better
than before
And it just happened
suddenly unexpected
Just as I had almost
resigned and given up
But it wasn’t surrender
nor was it resignation
that caused the change
It was life itself
There is an ongoing game that everyone is involved in one way or another.
You can either Play the game, Fight the game, Lose the game or Leave the game. But you can never Win the game. This is the nature of the game.
You are supposed to Play the game, and most people do. But some have seen through it and are Fighting the game. Sadly, that is just another way of playing the game. Fighting is actually a very important part of the game.
Many are Losing the game. This is the most important feature of the game – it is what makes it a game instead of a pastime.
Some of us are Leaving the game. That is as close to winning the game as you can get, because the game cannot be won by anyone. It can only be Played, Fought or Lost. Leaving the game is therefore the only sensible thing to do when you have seen through it.
By leaving the game you are no longer involved in winning or losing or fighting. Not even in playing. You are free.
You were always free, but somehow you got involved in the game just as everybody else. And you started playing it. Until one day you decide to leave the game. Or not.
If I remain in your memory
all else is irrelevant
My life will go on
as long as I am with you
That’s just as long
as I want it to be
There was a war raging
but we were none the wiser
because they didn’t let us know
what was really going on
There was an energy crisis raging
but we were none the wiser
because they didn’t let us know
what was really going on
There was a financial crisis raging
but we were none the wiser
because they didn’t let us know
what was really going on
There was a refugee crisis raging
but we were none the wiser
because they didn’t let us know
what was really going on
There was a pandemic raging
but we were none the wiser
because they didn’t let us know
what was really going on
There was a demonstration raging
but we were none the wiser
because they didn’t let us know
what was really going on
Whatever is raging us next
we will be none the wiser
because they won’t let us know
what is really going on
Timelessness is like being
absolutely weightless
in complete stillness
My self interest is so vast
that I have no self interest at all
I have come to realize
that to have no self interest
is in my best self interest
The path of giving
and the path of receiving
is one and the same
It has no beginning
and it has no end
We all walk it
At different speed
In different directions
The circular path of life
I am not my past
I am now
I will always be now
I have no future
There is only now
That is who I am
It is very simple
Being me
Life goes on
No matter what
It’s what it is
It’s what you’ve got
If you are rich
If you are poor
If you need less
if you need more
It still goes on
No matter what
Through thick or thin
It’s all you got
And by the end
When you are done
Then all you know
of things to come
is Life goes on
No matter what
It’s what it is
It’s what you’ve got
If you are rich
If you are poor
If you need less
if you need more
It still goes on
No matter what
Through thick or thin
It’s all you got
And by the end
When you are done
Then all you know
is life goes on
My dancing days are over
yet I have no regrets
I knew the day was coming
when I would lose my bets
My dancing days are over
yet I am still at peace
There are so many other things
that I can do with ease
My dancing days are over
and I don’t even mind
I’ve danced enough for many lives
to songs of every kind
My dancing days are over
but yours keep going on
So dance your heart out while you can
One day those days are gone
Does it make any difference
whether it is so or not
Does it change your life
or your actions in any way
If your answer to this is no
you are either very delusional
or you have found the very
core of existence in this life
We saw it coming!
What did we do?
I didn’t do much,
and so did you.
What can I tell you,
that you don’t know?
We have been clueless.
It goes to show.
We don’t accept it,
and yet we do!
I will regret it,
and so will you.
I’m breaking up
with who I’m used to be
It’s not working anymore
I’m still in love
but can’t go back again
to the one I’ve been before
I have found love
but in a different way
It has been going on for long
And now it’s time
to let this love of mine
become as clear as it is strong
There has never been a moment like this
There has never been another one at all
From the moment time began it has been here
From the moment time began it has arrived
There will never be a moment like this
There will never be another one at all
From the moment time began it’s going on
From the moment time began it will be here
Once again
I put my trust in you
as I know
that you have helped me
before
Long gone
is the time we spent
envisioning
all that we would be
and more
Where have you been
while I have not
required your service
What have you done
while I have left you
on your own
We used to be
an invincible team
Now we can both
fulfil that dream
I believed I could fly
and then I woke up
I believed I could die
and then I woke up
I believed what I knew
and then I woke up
I believed it was true
and then I woke up
I believed in my dream
and then I woke up
I believed inbetween
and then I woke up
I believed I was free
and then I woke up
I believed I was me
and then I woke up
I seem to love whatever I do
Not beforehand
And not at first
But as soon as I’ve got into it
So I have to be very wary
About what I choose to do
So I don’t start loving
Something that’s not good for me
Because sometimes
I just continue
Because I love it
Whatever it is I’m doing
This has been very detrimental
To my health
To my well being
Because this love is blind
Am I sick
Am I neurotic
Or am I in love with life itself
Just being here and now
Who the hell knows
Who the hell can tell
What this love is
Whether it’s virtue or vice
I certainly can’t
I’m much too involved
To see clearly on this
Even in retrospect
It’s my modus operandi
It’s just the way I am
Sometimes I like it
Sometimes I don’t
All I want to know
Is this a common trait
Or am I the only one
Who is afflicted with it
And if there are others
How do they handle it
Are they in therapy
Or in a monastery
Is it curable
Will it go away
Or is it a blessing
To be used diligently
I have no obligations to anyone
Never had
Never will
There is no one else to oblige
Never was
Never will be
The moon and the sun and the stars
Will witness
Will testify
That I am at the center of creation
Always was
Always will be
For I am that which is and is not
In eternity
And infinity
You may call me whatever you want
In response
In despair
I have no obligations to you
Only grace
If you care
I get increasingly interested in
intentional stagnation
A state of having had enough
but still be going on
With nothing on the horizon
except the horizon itself
And a sense of no ambition
but waking up to a new day
Is there any reason to celebrate?
Of course there is!
I’m celebrating that I am able to celebrate!
Not long ago I wasn’t.
I also celebrate that I’m telling you about it.
It’s been on my mind for quite some time now.
And if you’d like to celebrate with me
that’s worth celebrating too!
But I don’t really need a reason to celebrate.
That’s usually the best celebration.
Causeless celebration!
Celebrating the causeless cause
The balance of power is tilted
Just like it has always been
Towards those who issue the money
The ones who are never seen
The balance of power is tilted
And nothing can tilt it back
As long as we don’t know the reason
And don’t know we’re under attack
The balance of power is tilted
We’re fighting a losing war
The winner is business as usual
The loser the same as before
The balance of power is tilted
but nobody wants to know
who still is a part of the system
that tethered us long ago
The balance of power is tilted
Just like it has always been
Towards those who issue the money
The ones who are never seen
I have walked among geniuses
each of their kind
But I only saw outlines
as if I was blind
The core of each being
the seat of their soul
has somehow eluded
my view of the whole
To not see the forest
for all of the trees
A classic mistake
and the way many see
I have walked among geniuses
all of this time
Taken for granted
the way I take mine
While some have been noted
others have not
I finally notice
the ones I forgot
Revealing the grandeur
that’s been there for me
I am humbled by genius
wherever I see
You showed me the beauty of sadness
A beauty that I didn’t know
You made it so plain and so simple
and gave me a new place to go
I don’t know if you still remember
the time that we spent in Berlin
You showed me the beauty of sadness
in places where I’d never been
You showed me the beauty of sadness
and gave me a present to keep
You know I can still see the beauty
whenever I break down and weep
I read that you left us this morning
and found that it saddened me so
You showed me the beauty of sadness
and now it’s a lifetime ago
† 2013-10-27